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Thursday, December 27, 2012

TOM CRUISE'S NEXT BIT OF FANCY.... IS SHE AN ESSEX GIRL AND WILL SHE HAVE TO HOLD THE CANS?

Posted on 4:00 AM by Unknown

For those that might not know the connotation of having a club called "Beauty & Essex" implies fake boobs, orange skin and dancing round your handbag. Essex is widely regarded as the UK's capital of tacky - kind of like NJ's Jersey Shore. Of course, I can't confirm this from here but whoever owns this club is taking the piss by naming it 'Beauty & Essex', and you can bet your ass that this girl knows the whole scientology angle... I can only hope she follows the 'Essex Girl' tradition of spilling the beans after the first sex tryst..... my personal wish would be a headline of:

"HE WOULD ONLY DO ME FROM BEHIND AND KEPT CALLING ME 'DAVIE BOY' AFTER EACH THRUST"


Tom Cruise Grooming His Next Beard

All the queens over at In Touch must have been kiki-ing when they came up with that cover. That's some funny shit. Tom Cruise supposedly had a "wild night" with a lady in NYC on Dec. 18. "A source" (aka one of those crazed Scientology bitches who wears the sailor uniforms and keeps reluctant cultists in chains below deck on their big prison boat) says that Tom was "mesmerized" by restaurant manager and Jersey native Cynthia Jorge, 26. Tom ate at her joint, and that's when he randomly picked her to fake be into.
"She had her hair in a bun, wore tight black pants and looked gorgeous,” the source said. Tom wasn't "mesmerized," he was irritated as fuck because he knew his ass would look better in those tight black pants. Cruise and Cynthia went clubbing the next night, and Tom was supposedly rubbing his Xenu moistener on her. Uh huh. I don't buy this shit, either.
Less than 24 hours later, the duo — along with some friends — met up at Le Baron, where Cynthia huddled with Tom in a booth when he wasn’t pulling her out on the dance floor. “They did the salsa. He took her in his arms and spun her around the dance floor,” a witness gushes. “Tom looked like a pro.”
And things weren’t totally G-rated. “At one point, they began grinding together,” the witness tells In Touch. “It was straight out of Dirty Dancing. Tom seemed to be in his own world, completely smitten.”
Miz Vida Boheme (aka Patrick Swayze) just threw a "girl, you no Johnny Castle" side-eye from Movie Star Heaven. We all realize that Tom was actually staring at the male bartender and wondering how not to vom as he felt Cynthia's titters rub against his chest, right? You would think a "wild night" would involve taking a girl home for fuck times. Nope. Despite being highly "enamored" of the "Jersey Katie Holmes" (© Michael K.), Tom called her a car. And then sashayed down to the Eagle in a ballcap and sunglasses to get his man-kitty punched.
Seriously, this closet case shit must be hard. You gotta pick up random sluts and take them salsa dancing? When all you really want to do is sit on dicks? And then you have to process them through your cult and remove all of the free will wiring from their brains? And then you gotta keep checking the GPS to make sure they don't run away? And at the same time, the only place you can have a dude sit on your face is in the Celebrity Center's "gym?"And that place reeks like expired lube and crazy! Lay your burdens down, Tom Cruise.

Risqué business! Tom Cruise 'spotted dirty dancing with pretty brunette at New York night club'

By HAYLEY COYLE
PUBLISHED: 20:02, 26 December 2012 | UPDATED: 23:34, 26 December 2012

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Love is in the air for Tom Cruise it seems. 

The Mission: Impossible star may have found romance again - six months after his divorce from Katie Holmes. 
Cruise is said to be 'enamoured' with a 26-year-old New York restaurant manager after a date night of drinking and dancing at a French-themed night club in Chinatown, NY.  
Christmas romance: Tom Cruise is said to be smitten with New York restaurant manager Cynthia Jorge. Actor reportedly called her work place to ask her out after dining their with friends
Christmas romance: Tom Cruise is said to be smitten with New York restaurant manager Cynthia Jorge. Actor reportedly called her work place to ask her out after dining there with friends
Christmas romance: Tom Cruise is said to be smitten with New York restaurant manager Cynthia Jorge. Actor reportedly called her work place to ask her out after dining there with friends
According to In Touch magazine, Cruise, 50, met brunette beauty Cynthia Jorge on December 18 when he was dining at Lower East Side's Beauty & Essex - where Cynthia works as the manager. 
An eyewitness told the magazine: 'He was mesmerized by Cynthia.
'She had her hair in a bun, wore tight black pants and looked gorgeous.'
After a meal of sashimi and empanadas, Cynthia apparently handed Cruise her card... and the bold move paid off.  
Seductress: Cynthia is the manager of the restaurant Beauty & Essex located on the Lower East Side of NY
It is believed that Cruise called Beauty & Essex twice the very next day to track the young woman down and eventually got a message to her after being 'put on hold for a very long time'. 
Less than 24 hours later the duo - along with some friends - were seen at La Baron night club where Tom was 'sweeping her round the dance floor', reports In Touch. 
An eye-witness told them: 'They did the salsa. He took her in his arms and spun her around the dance floor. Tom looked like a pro.'
Then things started to get a bit racy, continued the witness. 
Le Baron: The French-themed club where Cruise was reportedly seen twirling the 26-year-old brunette round the dance floor
Le Baron: The French-themed club where Cruise was reportedly seen twirling the 26-year-old brunette round the dance floor
Six months single: Katie Holmes and Cruise divorced half a year ago and the former Dawson's Creek star has not been linked to any one else yet
Six months single: Katie Holmes and Cruise divorced half a year ago and the former Dawson's Creek star has not been linked to any one else yet. Pictured at the Music Box theatre in New York on Wednesday
'At one point, they began grinding together,' they said. 
'It was straight out of Dirty Dancing. Tom seemed to be in his own world, completely smitten.'
But ever the gentleman Cruise reportedly made sure a private car was waiting outside the club to whisk the Queens native back home safely. 
The Mail Online contacted Cruise's spokesperson for a comment but have not received a response. 
The Scientology-loving actor recently denied claims he has been romantically involved with Jennifer Ackerman, sister of actress Malin Ackerman. 
Cruise and Jennifer were apparently spotted spending time with each other at a Stockholm nightclub after the Swedish premiere of his latest film Jack Reacher but a representative has denied anything is going on. 
A source told E! News: 'The whole thing is completely ridiculous. Jennifer was there with her whole family who were cropped out of the picture. 
'She happily lives with her boyfriend in LA.'



Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2253452/Tom-Cruise-spotted-dirty-dancing-pretty-brunette-New-York-night-club.html#ixzz2GDJJi5N0
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